Grilled Banana Chocolate Marshmallow Sandwiches

Kenny and I love these. I think we would probably make them every night if they wouldn't make us gain 25 lbs. per week. No, no. I am positive we would make them every single night. Maybe just eat these for dinner, with a milkshake. Then for dessert, we could have ice cream sundaes. Too much?

Zzzzzzzz

I like my sleep. No, I love my sleep. It makes me very cranky when I miss out on sleep. I am not a nap person, I don’t need 10 hours a night, but when it’s time for bed, I can think of nothing else I would rather be doing. Plus, since we got our new bed, I am obsessed with sleeping more than ever.

I am sure that those of you with kids want to tell me to stick it, but I don’t have kids. These are the days to stockpile my sleeping hours. I know they will be few and far between if we ever decide to start a family. The stupid dogs are bad enough. The other night, Hazel decided she wanted to destroy the birds outside. We were sleeping with our window open and she was just running around the room going completely insane, listening to the hundreds of birds chirping. I was up at 3am that morning. I did not go back to bed. This was the beginning of "Who Needs Sleep 2008".

These past two weeks, for some reason, I cannot get to bed before midnight. I get up for work at 6am. I have learned that 6 hours is no good. I want 8. I have been dragging myself to work, barely awake, barely able to type, barely able to speak. I usually become coherent around noon. Thank God I do not operate heavy machinery. I would be a goner for sure.

See it?

We found some baby grass this weekend in the backyard! Actually, Kris found it-but it's there! It's finally starting to come in! I tried to take a picture, but it was so small that it didn't turn out. Doesn't matter. It's there. I promise.

Tough one to pull off

I know it's "Recipe Day", but frankly, I'm not in the mood. So, instead, I bring you this.

I have to admit, that I totally have a thing for guys with longer hair. There is just something about it. However, I am very particular on what flowy locks get my approval. Guys that have had the same hair since 1994 do not qualify.

Example

I realize that even if this guy had short hair, I would still not approve. It's pretty much a lose, lose situation for him. The shirt, the chain-yikes. And while we are on the subject of hair, facial hair is also very important. The poor guy couldn't even get that right. Well, neither can Kenny, but I still married him.

I do approve of the following (always and forever)

If I had never met Kenny, this is the type of fella I would have more than likely ended up with....He'''s jurst beautiiiflasfzx dansjklsahf slakhf adfdhwiefvxm,......sorry, hard to type while staring at perfection. Those eyes, that hair.....

Damnit Danielle

UGH-Nicole's sister apparently has nothing better to do. I've been tagged. Thanks a lot Danielle. If I don't do it, I am a party-pooper and if I do, I am just LAME. Well, look what option I chose. Damn you. It won't hurt my feelings if you don't read the rest of this post, really. And just for the record, I will not ever do this again. Got it?

The Rules:
Each player answers the questions about themselves. At the end of the post, the player tags other people and posts their name, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they've been tagged and asking them to read your blog. Here goes nothin'.

What was I doing 10 years ago?
Hmmm, 10 years ago I was almost done with my Junior year of high school. I probably had already checked out and was just going through the motions until summer break finally began. Beyond that, I remember nothing.

Five Snacks I Enjoy:
1. Meringues
2. Grapefruit
3. Cheese and crackers
4. Popcorn
5. Pretzels

Things I Would Do If I Were a Billionaire:
1. Travel
2. Donate
3. Take care of my family/friends (just one) forever
4. Have loads of fun
5. Build an eco-friendly house

Five Places I Have Lived:
1. New York
2. Arizona
3. Texas
4. Colorado
5. Dublin, Ireland (That one is just a wish)

Five People I Want to Get to Know Better (A nice way of saying “Tag. You’re it!”)
1. Amanda
2. Patti
3. Bonnie
4. Mimi
5. Scary Mommy

To be young again

A family friend of ours graduated high school yesterday. We went over to their house last night where I met Chloe.

Hi. I’m Chloe and I’m 4.

Hello. I’m Lauren and I’m 26.

Twwwweeeeennnnnntyyy sixth?

Yep. That’s old huh?

Really old.

I remember when I was little and I used to think 30 was old. How times have changed.

I definitely did not need to hear that

The people that I work with that have no sense of professionalism or secrecy when it comes to what they reveal about themselves during their workday.
There is one woman here, I swear to God, that has done or been involved with more messed up things than anyone I know. And I know some messed up people. It's fine. I am not judging her. But, the thing is, I am not her friend. I am barely an acquaintance and I know EVERYTHING about her.
There is also a group of people that sit behind me that "share" with each other throughout the day. I sit in awe, while pretending to listen to my iPod, listening to every word they say. Do they not see these conversations better fit for happy hour? Maybe they could dish their dirt at Starbucks one evening? Am I asking too much? I should say I used to just pretend to listen to my iPod. Now, I really do. I don't care what happened to them when they were little. I don't want to hear about how awesome it was when they cheated on their husband.
The only thing anyone knows about me here is that I am married and I actually like my husband. I do fun things with my weekends. We have been working on our house. That's it, and that's all they will ever know.
Every night when I leave this place, I think, wow-my life rocks. Everyone has their stories, their past, but my coworkers are some seriously F-ed up people.

Check it off the damn list!

Saturday morning was sprinkler and seed day. We are DONE with our yard! Now, we wait. Hopefully grass will grow. It’s been two whole days and I am annoyed that there is still no green back there. This will definitely help to teach me some patience.

Trips I made to ABC plumbing for random sprinkler parts=25,003

Times Kenny called me a F-ing retard=1

Leaks Kenny had to fix in the crawl space=3

Total number of hours our entire house smelled like poop because of the topsoil=48 and counting

Times I whined about helping=Way more than I should have

Total number of times I went into the crawl space=0 (I will not go in that place……scary)

Number of times I swept the kitchen floor=3 before realizing that it would keep getting messed up-just leave it

Times I want to redo a yard again in my lifetime=0

Number of mac-n-cheese snacks consumed from Sonic=6 (Have you tried them? They are FRIED mac-n-cheese and they are TO DIE FOR)

Gruyere Potato Gratin

I love cheese, so if I'm given an opportunity to add it to my food, I'm all over it.

1 pound large red potatoes
3/4 cup coarsely grated Gruyere (about 3 ounces)
1 large egg
3/4 cup milk, heated just to boiling
Salt and freshly ground black pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Butter a 1-quart gratin or shallow baking dish.
Bring a large saucepan of salted water to a boil. Peel potatoes and cut into thin slices (about 1/8-inch thick). Add potatoes to boiling water and cook approx. 4 minutes (a bit longer in high altitude). Drain potatoes well in a colander.
In gratin or baking dish, arrange potatoes, overlapping them, in 3 layers, sprinkling first 2 layers each with 1/4 cup Gruyere and salt and pepper, to taste.
In a small bowl whisk egg and add hot milk in a stream, stirring constantly. Season mixture with salt and pepper and pour evenly over potatoes. Sprinkle the potatoes with remaining 1/4 cup cheese and bake until top is golden and potatoes are tender, about 30 minutes

First Impressions

I think it is so interesting to see people’s first impression of me and then when they get to know me, how that drastically changes.

Many times, people tend to think I am a very proper person when we first meet. I don’t think I look very proper, but I guess it is a vibe I give off? The first time I drop an F-bomb, they look at me like, “Oh, isn’t that cute? The innocent girl just swore.” All those that know me, know that I use that word way more than I should. I know it can be tacky, but frankly, many times there is no better word. Fine, I’ll work on it…maybe.

Other times, people think that I am stuck up. This one is just based off of looks alone (I am not being conceited, that’s what I have been told.). I have had a bunch of people tell me that they were relieved when we met because they were not looking forward to it. They thought I would be super snobby and way stuck up. Again, I have my moments (for sure) but I would like to think, that they are just moments, not who I actually am. Could I be less caddy? Probably. Will it happen any time soon? Probably not.

A lot of times, people think I am loaded (money-wise, not alcohol-wise).
1. IF I was, do you think I would be working? Heck no! I am not one of those people that “likes” to work or thinks that it is something to do during the day. TRUST me, if I could not work, I would be all over it.
2. I got a pair of diamond studs (off of E-bay, for a penny. Yes, a PENNY) and I wear them every day and every day I get compliments on them and how beautiful they are. They are a carat each and look totally real. If someone flat out asked me if they were fake, I would totally tell them, but if they don’t, I keep my mouth shut. One day, 2 coworkers of mine were talking and one said to me, “Nice fake earrings.” The other guy jumped in and said, “Oh no. Lauren would never wear fake earrings. It’s not her style.” All the while I was just sitting there, smiling.
3. I do see how people can think this one though, although they are completely wrong. We are definitely fortunate, no complaints there. But, loaded? Not so much. I get peels once a month-from a friend. I get my hair done every 8 weeks-from a friend. My mom cuts it. You get the idea.

So, to sum it up. I am not as innocent as you may think. Far from it, actually. I am not proper. I am not rich. I am not stuck-up (most of the time). I do have a horrible sailor mouth. I wear fake diamonds and pretend they are real. I am a smart-ass, but mean no harm. I can be caddy from time to time. I like to have pretty hair and clear skin. Any questions?

Nice pants

(For some reason, I cannot find any other pictures of John Legend standing. It's probably pretty tiring holding that thing up all day long. Maybe that is why he plays the piano, so he can sit more often. This picture does not even fully show what I am talking about-booooooo.)

Kenny and I stopped at Old Navy the other day for some work pants. They had these really cool striped seersuckers and Kenny decided to get a pair. We got home and when he walked into the bedroom with them on, all I could do was chuckle.

I am not sure if you have ever noticed John Legend’s, um, southern region. His pants are not ever particularly tight, but his package is always accentuated. It seems to be especially obvious in the Target commercial he was recently in. I have pointed it out to Kenny more than once and every time we see him on TV, I just start to laugh.

Back to my story…so I am laughing at Kenny.

What’s wrong with them?

Nothing, John Legend. Nothing at all.

They are going back. Quit staring. It makes my uncomfortable.

French Onion Soup

I have made this soup completely from scratch and it took a few hours. Why bother when you can do Rachael Ray's 30 minute meals? I have made this a few times and it is pretty delicious! Start to finish took me just under a half hour! Not bad, not bad at all!

I did NOT sign up for THIS

Yesterday, I volunteered to work at the concession stand at Sky Sox Stadium (Triple A baseball) for a high school here in town. When I signed up for it, it said just DHS baseball: Concession. I assumed the high school was having some sort of tournament at the “big kid” stadium and it would be fun to watch them. My nephew plays Varsity for DHS, so I figured it would be a good time to catch a game. Cinde and I were supposed to call 1 hour before to see if the specific stand we were supposed to work would be opened. There were black skies and it was raining outside, so we thought chances were slim that we would even have to go. I called-they were open. We showed up at 9am and found our way to the concession area. We set everything up, keeping everything super simple and only prepping a few pretzels, hot dogs, etc. If they were going to cancel the game, they would do so at game time. Then it happened.

1. We found out it was a Sky Sox game, not a high school tournament
2. It was KID DAY
3. The game would not be canceled
4. Since Tuesday night, 5000 tickets had been sold

One of us happened to glance outside to the parking lot and, I swear to God, there was not an empty space. There were a million school buses parked and 1 trillion kids making their way to the stadium! Cook more hot dogs! Put on all the pretzels! Get everything stocked!
We worked 9-2, but I swear it felt like 5 minutes. We were busy the entire time. And not just busy, SWARMED by wads of kids all spending their parents money to get delicious treats. Cinde and I were pretty much awesome. I do have to say that the people at Sky Sox were less than prepared to handle this insane amount of children though. At one point the Pepsi, Diet Pepsi, Mountain Dew, and Root Beer were all running clear. All we had was pink lemonade-not a best seller. We ran out of cooked hot dogs a few times, cotton candy, churros, and a few other things. Those poor kids waited in line at least 10 minutes for me to tell them we were all sold out. All I have to say is God bless the parents and teachers that attended the game with all those kids. It was INSANE.

Seriously though, it just made me want to wait even more on having some children of my own.

How is this even fair?

I have two tattoos. For my 16th birthday, my mom took me to get my first tattoo. I picked out a sun. Why? I have no idea. Do I love suns? No. Do I love summer? No. Was there any sort of significance to getting a sun tattooed on my lower back? No. Needless to say, I had it covered with a maple leaf and two aspen leaves a couple years back. Much better. My second tattoo was a spur of the moment sort of thing. I went with some people (I hesitate to say friends because, frankly, they weren’t) one night to the tattoo place so they could all get one. They were all looking through the books and were having problems deciding. I found a really cool Celtic knot and decided, what the hell. One hour later, I had some new ink. For some reason I was really nervous about telling Kenny. It’s not that he tells me what I can and cannot do, but I just know he is not a fan. Prior to this, there was a piercing incident. Anyways, I think it was about two days later, we were hanging out with Kris and Patrick (who knew about it already and were also afraid for me) and Kris was showing her tattoo to Patrick for some reason. I chimed in and said, “Oh yeah. Kenny, look at this.” I swear to you, he did not speak to me for THREE days. He was totally pissed. “They make you ugly.” Real nice.

Why am I telling you all of this?

Kenny: So, I want to get a tattoo.

Me: Right on. So, I can schedule the other one I want to get then?

Kenny: Oh, no. YOU can’t get anymore.

Riiiiiiiigggggghhhhhhhht…..

Excuse you!

Friday morning, I had to take my mom to get a colonoscopy (she will love that I shared that). Anyways, that had to have been one of the most uncomfortable places ever to place a person such as myself. Anyone that knows me, knows that I am very opposed to anything having to do with backsides. I hate my butt, think it's too fat. I have never passed gas, farted, dropped ass, whatever you want to call it, in front of Kenny for as long as I have known him (over 9 years). I don't go #2 when he is around or when he will be around any time soon. For the longest time, he would have sworn on a bible that I never did it at all. This is all kindof funny, because if any of you know Kenny, you know that he, along with the rest of the McKee boys, well, to sum it up, have some pretty foul asses. Opposites attract I guess. I digress...

This place was like my hell. Every sentence, conversation, and word spoken in that place had to do with poop, colons, buttholes, etc.....It was all I could do to sit there and act like this was completely fine for me. Around every curtain you heard people endlessly farting. I guess they puff air into your colon and so it has to come back out afterwards. It was a symphony of ass trumpets.

When they were explaining the procedure to my mom, they said that they take the scope and go through FIVE feet of her business, then, get this, they take a picture when they get to the other side. To show that they made it. What? So, they are basically comparing a colonoscopy to climbing Pikes Peak? Make sure you get a picture when you get to the top! You want proof you made it, right?

Then all I could think of is that these people work here, every single day. This is their job. This doctor probes peoples butts for a living. I guess maybe I should stop complaining about mine. Things can always be worse.

The perfect gift

With Mother's Day around the corner, this personalized charm bracelet makes a great gift. Daffolilly has designed a beautiful sterling silver bracelet complete with one double-sided charm for $72.00. Daffolilly has also created a simple silver necklace to display the charms. Please feel free to ask if you are interested in knowing more about the necklace. Don't wait to order, the personalization takes a few days!

My good friend Lindsley makes these and they are adorable. I have seen hers and it would make a very special gift for any mother!

Butter Tarts

So, apparently, I am a very busy girl when it comes to Friday's. This is the second week in a row I have to post my "Friday Recipe" early!

This is one of my favorite desserts ever in the entire world. A lot of my family is Canadian, so I was brought up with sugar pies, maple candy, and butter tarts. As you can see, they are not the most beautiful dessert in the world, but they are so delicious! Many recipes online call for raisins, but I never use them. I also just buy the Jiffy pie crust. You can make it from scratch, but this is just what we have always done! Another thing is to make sure the butter is room temperature. If it is cold, it will not bake right. I have made this mistake more than once!

Pie crust (recipe of choice or boxed)

1 cup packed brown sugar

1/4 cup corn syrup

2 TBS butter-ROOM TEMPERATURE

2-3 tsp cornstarch

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

2 eggs

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

Make pie crust as directed. Roll out and cut into 4 inch circles. Put into cupcake span. I can usually make 10-12 out of this recipe.

For filling:

Mix everything together except the eggs until smooth. Add egg and mix. Fill tarts 3/4 full. Bake for about 25 minutes. Super easy!